Birth control spotlight: The implant

Even if you’re squeamish, you can handle learning a little bit more about the implant. It’s a super-effective method. It’s an ultra-tiny rod that gets inserted under the skin of your upper arm. It’s smaller than a match and practically invisible once you get it (so nobody ever needs to know you have it). And it can keep you from getting pregnant for up to four years.

Here are a few more details in case you’re considering a birth control upgrade:

• The implant releases progestin, which keeps your ovaries from releasing eggs. (As in no ovulation.) No egg, no place for the sperm to work their magic, and no pregnancy.
  
• It also thickens cervical mucus and that makes it hard for sperm to reach an egg. This extra level of pregnancy prevention makes the implant extra awesome.
  
• Getting the implant involves a shot to numb your upper arm. Then the rod is inserted under your skin. The whole procedure takes just a couple minutes.
  
• These women will tell you that the implant is totally worth it.
  
• The numbing shot might hurt a little and your arm may be a bit sore or slightly bruised for a couple days after. (Surely it’s much less painful than giving birth.)
  
• The implant is greater than 99% effective with typical use. That makes it one of the best, most reliable, and most effective choices out there!
  
• There’s nothing to take every day, week, or month, so you can carry on between the sheets without any hassles.
  
• Bedsider lists the implant under methods that are most effective, party-ready, easy to hide, and do me now. (And by “do me now” we mean it’s great for couples who like a lot of pregnancy prevention with their hot, spontaneous sex).
  
• The implant can be used by women who cannot take estrogen.
  
• Removal usually takes a few minutes more than insertion. They numb your arm and make a small incision to get it out.
  
• Most women can get pregnant right after it’s taken out, so have a backup method if your implant is removed, but you’re not trying to get pregnant.
  

We also have info on what the implant costs, where to get it, and it’s potential side effects.

Have a fabulous weekend,
Bedsider

P.S. They found an unoccupied bed. (Under a SpongeBob poster. How romantic.) But did they find any birth control? Only Funny or Die knows.