5 ways to cast a spell in the bedroom

There’s something about long, cold nights that makes us feel a little witchy. Maybe it’s the desire to slow down and get in touch with old practices and rituals, like quilting or using herbs as medicine, or maybe we’ve just watched all of television and need something new to do. Either way, you don’t have to be a witch to try your hand at a bit of sex magic this winter. If you want to cast a spell in the bedroom, try one of these magical modalities on for size.

1. Light a candle

The simple act of lighting a candle can be a potent ritual that focuses your intentions and desires. First, give the candle a job in the form of an intention, such as attracting a partner, bringing some fire to your sex life, cultivating self-love, or healing your heart after a breakup. Be clear and visualize exactly what you are asking the candle to do.

You should also pick a candle that corresponds with what you are asking for. Use color magic to help you decide which candle to use and choose big candles for big asks and small candles for smaller asks. Dress your candle in oil or herbs or carve a simple word or symbol into the candle that corresponds with the job you have given it.

Next, set the space. Lower the lights, put on some music that corresponds with your intention, and meditate on bringing forth your intention into this realm. Feel that intention in your body and visualize it coming to be as the candle burns.

2. Spice things up

Every herb and spice has energy. With intention, you can tap into that energy to cultivate sex magic.

If you’re nervous about a big date, try adding a little lavender to your decaf latte. When you want to cultivate an abundance of loving energy, try rose tea. To manifest hot sex, use cayenne, paprika, ginger, or cinnamon.

Make sure to give the herb or spice a job and visualize what you are bringing forth as you are both making the food or drink and as you are consuming it. The creation of food and drink is a ritual, so be intentional about what energy you’re giving to that ritual.

You can also work with herbs and spices on their own, without incorporating them into food. One way to do a very simple spell is to write down the name of someone you want to have hot sex with on a piece of paper. Add a heap of cinnamon over their name. Trace a circle on the paper with your finger through the cinnamon three times and visualize the person you are erotically calling out to.

3. Harness the elements

There are a few simple spells you can use to rid yourself of any energetic gunk that is blocking your access to pleasure. Whether it’s the clingy energy of an ex-lover or an old belief about sexuality that has you in its grip, it’s time to banish that block. Bringing in some of nature’s forces can be a powerful way to try this.

• Water. Water is powerful—it’s flowing; it’s moving; it isn’t stuck. When you’re in the shower, imagine that the water flowing over your body is washing the block or the pain from your last relationship right down the drain. Add salt, especially rubbed over your heart and abdomen, to supercharge this ritual.

• Fire. Fire is also a great tool for releasing blocks that are keeping you from having your best sex life. The first step in this ritual is to write about the block for at least five minutes. What has this block kept you from? What pain are you still holding on to? How does it feel in your body? Now take that paper and burn it (outside, safely). Build a fire with intention or just light the paper and toss it into a pit. Watch it burn and transform and release the words written on it.

4. Use your words

This simple sex magic ritual involves just pen and paper. When we speak our words out loud or write them down, we are bringing our inner desires and inner world into the outer world, which is the essence of magic. Have a sexual fantasy that you want to bring into reality? Write it down, in detail, in the present tense.

Whatever you’re trying to bring forth, visualize it and feel it in your body as you write it out. Place your written spell somewhere that you can see it every day. Recite it every night before you go to bed, like a prayer for pleasure.

5. Visualize what you want

Visualizing the sexual reality that you want to manifest is very powerful, but did you know you can use visualization techniques and magic during sex too?

One technique you can use is the spiral of erotic energy. As you undulate your hips during sex, visualize a spiral of erotic energy forming in your pelvis. The spiral starts out as a small, spinning orb of energy and continues to grow, spreading throughout your body until it shoots out of the crown of your head, connecting you with the universe.

Then let all of the energy from your partner and the universe flow back through you, adding to the spiral of orgasmic energy. If you want to use this energy to manifest or create magic, you can give it an intention, and then when you release that energy in climax, the spell will be complete.

Whether you’re riding the waves of the spiral or just adding a little extra cinnamon to your latte as you dream of the hot sex you’re going to have tonight, try embracing the magic inside you and see where it takes you.